


The Adventures of @Blond_Guy and @thanksmom

by Theyna_Shipper



Category: Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard - Rick Riordan
Genre: Alex follows him, Everyone Is Alive, F/M, Gayyyyyyy, M/M, Magnus has an active twitter, Mortal AU, My first MCGA fic so please be gentle, Other, They're neighbors but they don't know it, Twitter AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-26
Updated: 2019-12-12
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:41:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21575434
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Theyna_Shipper/pseuds/Theyna_Shipper
Summary: Magnus has a very active twitter where he narrates events from his life. Alex follows him and enjoys replying to his tweets. What they don't realize is that they're neighbors.
Relationships: Blitzen/Hearthstone, Blitzstone - Relationship, Fierrochase - Relationship, Halfborn Gunderson/Mallory Keen, Magnus Chase/Alex Fierro, Samir - Relationship, Samirah al-Abbas/Amir Fadlan
Comments: 37
Kudos: 299





	1. Blond_Guy

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, please like and comment! I honestly have no idea how long this will end up being, and updates will be probably be sporatic.

_Welcome to Twitter! Would you like to sign up with Facebook or an email address?_

I input my email address. 

_Please select a handle and username. We suggest MChase23949._

I deliberate for a few minutes before deciding. 

Handle: @blondguy

Username: @Blond_Guy

My friends will know who I am, but hopefully no one else will. 

_Please select passcode between 6-18 characters. It must contain at least one number._

******

_Do you want to add a profile picture?_

I find a photo of Kurt Cobain. Again, my friends will find it funny, but no one else will get it. 

_Would you like to add a bio?_

Enjoy these random stories from my life or don't, I'm too tired to care. 

_You're all set!_

I figure I should tweet something, so I just go with my most interesting experience from today. 

Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 7:54 P.M.  
Why is choosing a username so hard?

To my surprise, I get a reply a few minutes later, and it's not from one of my friends. I don't recognize the username, and the profile picture only shows green hair. 

thanksmom (@clay123)  
At 7:57 P.M.  
@blondguy Imagine being stuck with "clay123"

Samirah (@sam_al-abbas)  
At 8:05 P.M.  
@blondguy @clay123 Just choose your name. Makes it so much easier. 🙄

Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 8:06 P.M.  
@sam_al-abbas Boring. Besides, what if I don't want people to find me?

Samirah (@sam_al-abbas)  
At 8:08 P.M.  
@blondguy I found you.

Blond_Guy (@blond_guy)  
At 8:11 P.M.  
@sam_al-abbas 🙄

I check my notifications. How did all my friends plus one random person find me so quickly?

Samirah (@sam_al-abbas) followed you!  
thanksmom (@clay123) followed you!  
AngelofFire (@mkeen79) followed you!  
viking_man (@gunderson_halfborn) followed you!  
insertcoolnamehere (@_t_j_jr1111) followed you!  
Blitz (@BlitzensBest) followed you!  
Hearthstone (@magic_man) followed you!  
Amir (@Amir_F) followed you!

I follow all of them back, including @clay123, whose account primarily consists of funny replies to other peoples' posts. Hopefully my brief foray into social media won't be too damaging. I close my laptop and go to make dinner.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm not going to do summaries most of the time cus it'll often just be a list of post transcripts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TBH I have no idea where I'm going with this fic.

Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 4:23 P.M.  
So apparently Bunsen burners are a LITTLE more intense than a cigarette lighter? #Chemistry

AngelofFire (@mkeen79)  
At 4:27 P.M.  
@blondguy Good Lord, blondie, what happened?

thanksmom (@clay123)  
At 4:33 P.M.  
@blondguy I'm sure there's an excellent story here.

Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 4:34 P.M.  
@clay123 Yes and I'm not telling

viking_man (@gunderson_halfborn)  
At 4:37 P.M.  
haha you almost burned down chem lab

thanksmom (@clay123)  
At 4:40 P.M.  
@blondguy @gunderson_halfborn) Wish I'd been there. Sounds more interesting than getting kicked out of English for bringing soup. 

So this means that my mysterious Twitter friend is in high school. 

Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 4:47 P.M.  
@clay123 Oh do tell me about your contraband soup adventures. 

thanksmom (@clay123)  
At 4:48 P.M.  
@blondguy Im hella sick and I tried to bring chicken broth to school but I spilled it and got caught. Stupid no food rule. :(

Blond_Guy (@blonguy)  
At 4:49 P.M.  
@clay123 :( get well soon

~~~~~~~~

thanksmom (@clay123)  
At 10:03 P.M.  
It's so h*cking cold

Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 10:10 P.M.  
Watch the language. 

thanksmom (@clay123)  
At 10:13 P.M.  
h*ck off

It is unseasonably cold in Boston, which makes me wonder if he/she/they live in the area, but the odds are pretty low. It's cold lots of places.  
I kind of want to know more about this person. I decide to post a distinctly Boston photo, just to see if it gets a reaction. 

Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 3:33 P.M.   
Snow in Boston Commons (Click here for image)

soupcriminal (@clay123)  
At 3:37 P.M.   
@blondguy Oh I just moved near there

That's cool. Though why I care so much about this one oddly talkative Twitter follower, I'm not sure.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Magnus meets his new nextdoor neighbor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Varying from the previous format, now we might actually start to see some plot. Or not. Depends what I feel like. 
> 
> Please like and comment. If you have prompts/requests/suggestions, please let me know!

The old couple who lives next door to me is moving out, the Boston winters got too cold for them. It was kind of nice having predictable, quiet neighbors who would leave me alone when my mom was on business trips (i.e. most of the time), so I'm not 100% excited to get someone new that I will have to figure out. Still, I figure it would be neighborly to bring them some cookies, and offer to help move some boxes or something. So I bake cookies (yeah I can cook, occupational hazard of being home alone most of the time) and go next door to see what's in store for me.

I can't say I'm prepared for who opens the door. He appears to be about my age, but shorter and thin. He's wearing lime green cords, a hot pink v-neck, and pink sneakers. His hair is green, and in a bun at the nape of his neck. "Can I help you?" he says, casually leaning against the door frame. 

I wasn't prepared for this because God Almighty he is gorgeous. 

"Umm- I'm Magnus, and I guess you're my new next door neighbor, and I brought cookies?" 

"Nice to meet you, Magnus from next door, care to come in?" He steps aside and gestures for me to enter. 

I come in. The apartment is basically a mirror image of mine, and almost entirely undecorated. "Nice place," I say. That's what you're supposed to say in someone else's house, right? 

My neighbor raises his eyebrows like he knows exactly how unappealing his bare floor and walls are. "I mean, it's got a lot of potential," I add. 

"I guess so," he says "I forgot to introduce myself, I'm Alex Fierro." He grabs my hand and shakes it. I feel like I've been static shocked. 

I hold up the cookies. "Where do you want me to set these down?"

He takes the Tupperware and opens it. "They smell _amazing_. What are they?" He takes a bite out of one. "Oh my God, did you _make_ these? This is seriously the best cookie I've ever had."

"Thanks," I mutter. "I did make them. It's my friend's grandma's recipe, I'm kind of obsessed with baking, so you'll probably be getting a lot of food from me whether you want it or not." 

"Don't worry about wanting it, I will _pay_ you to bake for me," he says. 

I shrug. "It just feels rude to make the whole floor smell like cookies and then not give anyone any." 

He laughs. "Speaking of being rude, I haven't asked you to sit down. So please, sit down?"

I look for somewhere to sit in the unfurnished room. Just then, Alex boosts himself on to the counter and gestures to the island across from him. I hop up awkwardly. "So are you new to Boston or just to the apartment?" I ask. 

"New to Boston. Just finishing up my senior year here after my dad kicked me out." He rolls his eyes. "I'm eighteen and my grandpa left me a ton of money in a trust, so I'm fine, but a new location felt appropriate." 

I'm not entirely sure how to respond to this. Then my eyes fall on a water bottle in the corner of the kitchen, decorated with a gender-fluid pride flag. "Did he kick you out because...?" No, that's too personal. "You don't have to answer that."

Alex sees where I'm looking. "Yeah, couldn't put up with modernity. Or the load of money that I inherited and he didn't. Not that we ever got along anyways. You live with your parents or what?"

"Yeah, I live with my mom, but she travels a lot for work. What school are you going to?"

He names a public school near here. "How about you?" he asks. 

"Private school."

The conversation grinds to a halt, because we brought up school and no one talks about that except when there's no conversation to be had. Fortunately, conversation arrives in the form of a small hairless cat jumping on the counter next to me and startling me so badly I fall off the counter. 

After I get over the initial shock, I look up to see where the cat went. It is sitting in the lap of a certain Alex Fierro, who is shaking with laughter. "Sorry," he says, looking up, "But you should have _seen _yourself." He sets down the cat and helps me up, still laughing. "I'd say Pottery Barn apologizes but I'm sure she doesn't."__

__I look at the cat. "Pottery Barn?"_ _

__"I found her hanging around my old pottery studio. Speaking of which, do you know any around here?"_ _

__"Sorry, you're looking at the least artistic person in Boston. I can ask some friends, though."_ _

__"Thanks."_ _

__I look at a clock and realize it's been twenty minutes, and that I need to clean the house before my mom gets home. "Well, I should be going," I say. "Enjoy the cookies. And if you need any help moving boxes, or anything, let me know."_ _

__"I might take you up on that," Alex says. "See you around."_ _

__As I leave, I pull out my phone to text my friends on the group chat we save for "emergencies"- a.k.a. every minor inconvenience in my life._ _

__Magnus: HELP I MET MY NEIGHBOR AND HES 18 AND BEAUTIFUL._ _

__A few minutes later, I get a response._ _

__Mallory: Gay_ _

__Thank you, Mallory, very helpful._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Magnus is 100% the sort of person who loves baking and if you disagree you can fight me.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Annnnnd back to the Twitter format. Let me know if there's a format you prefer that I should tell the rest of the story in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, please like and comment
> 
> Blond_Guy (@blondguy)= Magnus  
> soupcriminal (@clay123)= Alex  
> AngelofFire (@mkeen79)= Mallory  
> viking_man (gunderson_halfborn)= Halfborn  
> insertcoolnamehere (@_t_j_jr1111)= T.J.
> 
> The other usernames are self-explanatory
> 
> Also I'm trying a different format to indicate comment threads

Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 6:03 P.M.  
Honestly I hate a lot of people but the one I just met was ok

>soupcriminal (@clay123)  
At 6:04 p.m.  
Same

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 12:00 A.M.  
Good morning

>Samirah (@sam_al-abbas)  
At 12:02 A.M.   
Go to sleep what are you doing up this late

>>Blond_Guy  
At 12:03 A.M.   
i just woke up and felt like saying hello, what are YOU doing up this late?

>>>Samirah (@sam_al-abbas)  
At 12:03 A.M.  
@blondguy Homework now go to bed

>Blitz (@BlitzensBest)  
At 12:07 A.M.  
Sleep children

>>Hearthstone (@magic_man)  
At 12:08 P.M.  
You too @sam_al-abbas

>>>Samirah (@sam_al-abbas  
At 12:10 A.M.  
@blondguy Uh oh we made your gay dads angry

>>>>Hearthstone (@BlitzensBest)  
At 12:11 A.M.  
I'd argue but Blitz says we all need to sleep so good night

>Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 12:13 A.M.  
Good night me

>soupcriminal  
At 1:01 A.M.  
wth I missed all of this

~~~~~~~~

Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 5:14 P.M.  
Anyone know a good recipe for carbonara

>insertcoolnamehere (@_t_j_jr1111)  
At 5:17 P.M.  
Only if you invite me over to share it.

>>Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 5:19 P.M.  
No because if I invite you then you'll bring @gunderson_halfborn and then he'll bring @mkeen79 and she'll bring @sam_al-abbas and she'll bring @Amir_F and @BlitzensBest and he'll bring @magic_man :p

>>>viking_man (@gunderson_halfborn)  
At 5:23 P.M.   
It'll be a party :D

>soupcriminal (@clay123)  
At 5:21 P.M.  
Click for link to article/HowToMakeCarbonara

>>Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 5:23 P.M.  
Thank you to the one helpful person on this post

>>>soupcriminal (@clay123)   
At 5:30 P.M.  
i too like food


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alex invites Magnus to a housewarming party and things get gAYYYYYYY.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still playing around with formats. I'm only planning on narrating from Magnus' point of view for now. 
> 
> Please like and comment!

9:30 A.M. on a Sunday is an ungodly time for someone to knock on your door, right?

I'm up and dressed, but my brain isn't exactly in a state to talk to people. 

But as a good person, I go to answer the door. It's Alex, dressed in a denim skirt, black leggings, a long-sleeved forest green button-down, and tan suede ankle boots. Her hair is braided down her back. It's more off her face than last time, which gives me opportunity to notice her striking eyes. They're- what's the word? Heterochromatic. _Hetero? Ironic._ One is a dark brown, like lacquered wood. The other is very pale amber, like stained glass. I don't know how I missed them before. Not that I'm staring at her eyes. 

"Good Morning?"

"Oh shoot, did I come to early?" Alex asks. "I heard you shouldn't bother anyone before 9:30 and I'm an early riser so..."

"No, no, you're fine, I've been up for an hour."

Alex exhales in relief. "Well, I finished you're cookies and you're not supposed to return a dish empty, so I made you caramel corn." 

"You didn't have to do that, but thanks," I tell her. "Come on in."

She sets the dish down on my counter. "You've got some very midwestern manners," I tell her. 

She shrugs. "I've moved a lot. My accent's impossible to place, too." 

"Let me guess, you have to flee every state to avoid being prosecuted for your crimes," I joke. 

"No," she snorts. 

"That's exactly what a criminal would say!"

"Be gay, do crime," she says, throwing a peace sign. "So," she continues, "I'm having a housewarming party, trying to meet some neighbors, and I wanted to drop off your invitation." She hands me an envelope. "I made it a potluck so I could force you to cook for me again."

"I'm just glad you liked it," I tell her. "I'll be there."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 4:07 P.M.   
Going to a party, what's one thing y'all hosts wish your guests would do?

>carbonaraexpert (@clay123)  
At 4:13 P.M.   
RSVP!!!!!!!! But if you already have, offer to clean up. And don't be afraid to talk to us.

>>carbonaraexpert (@clay123)  
At 4:15 P.M.  
Hosting a party, what's one thing y'all guests wish your hosts would do?

>>>Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 4:17 P.M.  
Don't apologize for everything. It's totally chill

~~~~~~~~~~~

A week later, I find myself at Alex's door in a semi-casual outfit that Blitz forced me into- skinny jeans, a navy blue short-sleeved button down, and unwillingly brushed and cut hair. It's 6:35; I know I'm not supposed to arrive right at 6:30, but I live next door so I can't be "fashionably late" without it looking weird. 

I knock. Alex answers the door, wearing a blush pink dress, green sweater, green ballet flats, and her hair down. It looks nice down. It looks nice up, too. Ok, maybe I have payed a little attention to her hair. "Am I early?" I ask. 

"Nope!" she says chipperly. "You're the first one here though. Can I take that?" She points at the dish in my hand. 

"Hm? Oh, sure. It's carbonara."

She laughs. "What's funny about carbonara?" I ask. 

"Nothing, just something I read online," she mutters. "I love carbonara."

I follow her into the kitchen. "How's Boston treating you?"

"Cold, but the neighbours are nice." She winks at me. _Is she flirting with me?_ "I guess you get used to the weather?"

"I guess," I tell her. "I mean, I still get cold without fail every winter. But that's life."

Someone rings the doorbell. Alex goes to answer. "There's snacks on the table!" she calls. 

People from this floor slowly trickle in, greeting Alex, talking to each other. I've never actually talked to my neighbours much- we say hi and we get each other's mail when we're on vacation, but we don't see each other outside of living next door to each other. At some point Alex finds me lingering in the corner with a plate of food, admiring a clay vase. 

"Nice vase," I tell her. 

"Thanks," she says. "I made that, actually. Finally found a pottery studio in Boston." 

"Wow. You're really good. If I tried that it would just be a useless blob."

"You've got talents," she says, clapping me on the shoulder. "Cooking sure counts. And it's more useful than pottery."

"Can you clay-fire a knife? If we're talking survival skills, that might be more useful."

"A clay knife would shatter on impact. Leave lots of shrapnel, but single-use only."

"It terrifies me that you've thought that through."

"No, I've just gotten enough clay shrapnel stuck in my hand." She holds out her palm. It's dotted with scars. "See?"

I wince in sympathy. "Ouch. I have a burn on my wrist, from a failed attempt at crême brulée." I hold out my arm. 

She grabs my hand and looks. "That looks bad, how old is it?"

"Like a year." 

She realizes she's still holding my hand, and drops it. 

"We live dangerous lives," I joke, trying to break the tension. 

She laughs. "We sure do."


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Magnus' neighbor's music choice reveals his online friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! This was really short for me, but I had fun with it. There's honestly so much plot I can do with a fic like this. Please like and comment, I'll be doing more MCGA fics soon so check them out. 
> 
> Also I don't actually listen to PATD

carbonaraexpert (@clay123)  
At 7:07 A.M.  
Happy thanksgiving break, I'm going to eat food and then die

>Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 7:45 A.M.  
That actually sounds wonderful

>>insertcoolnamehere (@_t_j_jr1111)  
At 8:00 A.M.  
Hey no don't die you guys

>>>carbonaraexpert (@clay123)  
At 8:03 A.M.  
Don't tell me what to do

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 11:02 P.M.  
2 more weeks of school til xmas we can do this you guys

>carbonaraexpert (@clay123)  
At 11:05 P.M.  
Sorry can't hear you over a lab report 2 papers and 5 finals

>>Amir (@Amir_F)  
At 11:07 P.M.  
I think the fact that we're all on Twitter this late indicates that we can't do this

>>>Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 11:10 P.M.  
Good point, see y'all at my funeral 

>>>AngelofFire (@mkeen79)  
At 11:12 P.M.  
@sam_al-abbas isn't even yelling at us she must be dead too

>>>>Samirah (@sam_al-abbas)  
At 11:15  
If you didn't want me to yell at you you shouldn't have tagged me

>>>>>Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 11:17 P.M.  
Run

~~~~~~~~

Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 7:06 P.M.  
Hey to my neighbor who is playing Panic! At the Disco so loudly that I can hear it, can I put in a request for Saturday Night

>carbonaraexpert (@clay123)  
At 7:08 P.M.  
Sure

>>Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 7:10 P.M.  
Hey they actually did it

>>>Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 7:11 P.M.  
Are you my neighbor

>>>>carbonaraexpert (@clay123)  
At 7:20 P.M.  
Lol idk I just switched it to Girls/Girls/Boys

>>>>Blond_Guy (@blondguy)  
At 7:23 P.M.  
Yeah you're definitely my neighbor

>>>>>carbonaraexpert (@clay123)  
At 7:24 P.M.  
Then come say hello

~~~~~~~~~~~

Hoping I'm not mistaken, I go to Alex's apartment. He opens the door without stopping to pause his music. 

"Carbonara expert?" I ask.

"Blond guy?"

"The very same."

"Come on in," Alex says.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, hope you enjoyed.
> 
> Update: THANK YOU FOR 100 KUDOS


End file.
